'AITA for calling off my wedding after my fiance bought a house with his mom without even telling me?'

Imagine being engaged, planning a future, mapping out a dream home, and building a life together from the ground up.

For a 28-year-old woman, this was her reality, until one day she suddenly found out that her fiance had other plans, prompting her to ask, "AITA for calling off my wedding after my fiance bought a house with his mom?" on Reddit's popular "AITAH" forum. 

Bride-to-be is left in shock after fiance secretly buys a house with his mother

The original poster (OP) began her story by writing, "Okay so, me (28F) and my fiance (30M) have been together 5 years. We were planning our wedding for this fall and had been talking for YEARS about our future like kids, finances, and buying a house together. We had a whole plan to save up, find something we both loved, and make it our home. This was talked about a lot."

It turns out, that while she was carefully planning their future, "he already bought a house. But not with me… with his MOM. And he didn’t even tell me he was looking."

His reasoning was that his mother found "the perfect place" and convinced him to split it with her because she "didn’t want to rent anymore."

Instead of securing a future with his soon-to-be-wife, "he’s financially tied to his mother, who’s going to be living there fulltime."

And when OP confronted him, his response was even more infuriating.

Bride-to-be labeled 'dramatic' after she calls off wedding

"I just stared at him like… wtf?? And when I asked where I fit into all this, he goes, 'Oh, well, you can move in too, of course!'" the OP wrote. 

"Like I’m supposed to be thrilled to live in a house his MOM picked out, partially owns, and is just… there all the time," she continued. 

To make matters worse, he also admitted that he bought the house because she was "taking too long" to save and his mother offered him a "faster way" to own something.

That was the breaking point for OP. 

"I was so shocked and pissed, I told him I needed space. And the more I thought about it, the more I realized I can’t marry someone who thinks this is normal. So, I called off the wedding," the woman explained. 

And just like that, the backlash began. His family bombarded her with messages, calling her "dramatic" and insisting "it’s just a house."

Even her own parents thought "canceling the whole wedding was extreme." But to her, this wasn’t just about a house—it was about trust, partnership, and the blatant disregard for their future together.

She concluded her post, writing, "Like… am I losing my mind?? AITA or is this a giant red flag??"

Redditors don't think the bride-to-be did anything wrong by calling off the wedding

Fellow Redditors had no doubts about the woman's dilemma and overwhelmingly supported her stance.

One said, "NTA - He didn't tell you, he didn't include you, and he just expects you to live with his mom. You're an afterthought."

Another added, "Agree. The kick in the teeth is that he made sure to take care of himself in terms of big-ticket assets, leaving OP exposed if they should ever split. And this idea of a 30-year-old being okay living with mom for the rest of his life? OP is right to bounce."

Someone else noted, "Mom probably is/will continue to be the beneficiary of his life insurance, 'to protect the house'. Fiancé is already married to his mother, for life. Glad OP found out sooner rather than later."

"NTA it’s not just about the wedding. It’s about the life you are going to live with him. If he puts his mother first everything or makes important decisions like this without you it will cause a lot of conflict. And it’s not just a house, him buying a house with her means he won’t be able to buy one with his wife for quite some time," another comment read. 

One more declared, "NTA. He's chosen who he wants to live with...and it's not you. Your parents are not the ones who will be living with her. And why are you not blocking your ex's family?"

"This dude is never going to find another woman again. lol  They will run for the hills when he tries to sell them on moving in with him and his mother. Lmao 🤣," one more stated. 

Another person observed, "NTA. You two are not compatible and want different things in life. Better to find out now than after the wedding."

One person explained, "NTA He knew what he was doing was wrong or he would have told you about it. He wants you to call off the wedding. It's his way out."

"NTA… walk away. He’s not ready to be an adult," another offered. 

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