'AITA for cutting ties with my mom on Christmas Eve after she called my niece an unwanted affair child?'

Christmas is a time when everyone eagerly anticipates the joy of festivities and togetherness, especially young children. However, when a grandmother drunkenly refers to her grandchild as "an affair child no one wanted," even the festive spirit can't undo the hurt.

A Reddit user, Far_Two_8016, took to the AITAH sub-section to share her story, explaining that she severed ties with her mother after she mistreated her older brother's child.

Woman slams her mother for calling her niece unwanted

Starting the post with the question, “AITAH I cut contact with my mother on Christmas Eve because she told my 4 years old niece she is an affair child that no one ever wanted?” the user, a 30-year-old female, shared her experience.

She explained that her 43-year-old brother has a four-year-old daughter from an affair, revealing, “It was fairly ugly, as he kept the daughter hid from his wife for as long as he could,” The user added that the truth came to light when the girl was two years old.

The OP (original poster) shared that his brother has been partially present in the little girl’s life “by visiting her and sending money and bringing gifts.”

However, the baby’s mother gave him an ultimatum to either recognize “the child as his own and legally give her money, or she will not allow him to visit anymore.” She reasoned that the girl has often wondered whether her father would back again after a visitation. 

“Now he tries to better himself. For the first time he wanted the girl to spend Christmas with us, in family,” shared the OP, before noting that despite the planning, he was not able to attend the party as he had to leave the country before Christmas for urgent business needs. 

She added, “But the little daughter was already very excited to meet her grandma and spend the holidays with daddy. She is a really sweet child but overly sensitive and shy,” before continuing, “My brother asked me if I can still take her to our family dinner even though he will not be there. I agreed.”

However, the OP’s mother “drank too much (she does this a lot),” and created a scene. The author shared that since she had a “very close relationship” with her ex-sister-in-law and since the divorce she started drinking more.

Though the OP’s niece “wanted to give her a gift she made, some drawing but she was cold.” 

However, the author’s mother broke all limits when “in the end she told her that she was a kid no one wanted and her existence destroyed our family.” Naturally, the words hurt the little girl who “started crying and wanted to go back home to her mother.” “So my mother didn't lose the chance to call the girl's mom "that lil h0e" (she is in her late 20s),” continued the OP, before noting that girl’s mother knew the man was married when she aided in cheating. 

Meanwhile, the OP wrote, “I called my brother. He got very angry and said he will cut all financial help to mother. We grew up very poor, partly because both our parents were drunks. Dad is god know where, probably homeless, but we kept mother around.”

“I took the girl and I told my mother I don't want to see her ever again. My brother was a serial cheater with his wife and she tolerated it. A kid was probably too much for her,” added the author before noting, “But mom blamed an innocent 4 years old.”

She continued that though she spent the night with her niece in a hotel, the little girl’s Christmas was ruined. “I feel very guilty myself. I didn't buy her any gift,” confessed the author. 

She explained, “My brother said he gave mother the money to buy her something under the tree, but she didn't. So we kept exchanging gifts and she was looking at the family completely lost. My mother blames the child and her mother for all this,” before putting forward her observation that her mother probably hated the child. 

“I feel so bad because everyone had a gift under the tree. We had 2 other kids her age there and they got presents and she didn't. But for a 4 years old she was weirdly mature about it. She asked the other girl if she can see her doll and said she must have been nice to receive such a gift I hate my family so much,” concluded the OP. 

Internet dubs OP's mother to be AH in this situation

As the Reddit user's post went viral, the netizens were divided in their opinion regarding the OP's status. While some released her from the charge of being an a*****e, some panned her for not buying a gift for her niece. Nevertheless, the Redditors unanimously decided that the grandmother was the meanest one in the mix. 

One of the users said, "Celebrate little christmas with her in january. Tell her grandma was just being mean because she got coal in her stocking for being naughty. Tell her that you forgot to inform santa that 4yo would be with you guys for christmas and will visit on little christmas instead. Make it intimate and special for her. maybe invite her mom too so she can feel the safety of both her parents being there for the do over Christmas. oh and nta though your mother is."

"No one got her a gift? So the kid sat around watching others open gifts and there was nothing for her? You are all TAH," declared someone else.

Another user mourned for the little girl, "My heart is crying for that little girl. NTA. But you and brother could have made sure mom had bought presents and you could have bought her a little something too. She’s a child."

"From the post you can see the family’s a wreck. But OP’s comments cement they have no idea of what a wreck they are. 🤦🏻‍♀️ the child’s mom needs to keep her away from this pot of steaming dysfunctional stew," chimed in someone else while declaring, "ESH. Except that child."

"NTA. Why do people always chose the most helpless and innocent (the children) as the target of their hate. I'm glad your brother is taking responsibility and I hope both you and your brother break this generational curse your parents are trying to inflict on you," added someone else. 

This article contains remarks made on the Internet by individual people and organizations. MEAWW cannot confirm them independently and does not support claims or opinions being made online.