'AITA for immediately donating the gifts my stepmother bought for my children?'

The relationship between a mother and a daughter is pure and loving. However, the same cannot be said about a stepchild and a stepmother as, most of the time, the bond of love and affection is missing between the two.

Recently, a woman on Reddit's popular "Am I the A*****e" forum shared an incident where she explained that she immediately donated the gifts her stepmother bought for her children.

Sour relationship between woman and her stepmother

The woman wrote on the AITA forum that she is 34 years old and has no contact with her stepmother, Mary. She added that it’s been five years since she cut her off from her and her family’s lives. She hasn’t seen her son (eight) since he was three years old, and she’s never met her daughter (four).

She wrote on the forum, "Throughout the years, she has attempted to contact me and my kids several times. My father used to help her sometimes. He’d tell me how awful she felt, how much she wanted to meet my daughter, and that the kids needed their grandma (I’ve never considered her a grandparent, as both my mother and mother-in-law are active in their lives)."

She added that several fights later, her father apologized and stopped assisting her, but Mary still tries to get in touch with her quite often. She said that she always states that she has no interest in seeing her or allowing her to be a part of her children’s lives.

Woman donates gifts her stepmother bought for her children

The woman continued on the post that her son’s birthday was in September. That day, a large box was delivered to their building. When she opened it, she found that more than a dozen new toys were there for her children, along with a note that read "Grandma Mary loves you both." She later found out that her stepmother had bought the toys during a recent trip to the US.

She wrote, "I couldn’t think of that as anything besides a manipulation tactic. My children are barely aware that she exists, why would she send them both a box full of toys on my son’s birthday? I also think she planned the delivery for a time she thought the kids would be home so that they’d see the toys immediately."

She continued, "Either way, my husband and I decided not to keep any of the toys. We donated them all throughout October. The kids never saw any of them."

She then mentioned that last week her father called her and said Mary had just told him about the toys and wanted to know whether the children liked them. She told him the truth and there was an argument between the two.

She wrote, "My father called me cruel and ungrateful for what I did. He said he understands Mary and I don’t get along, but she still cared enough to spend hundreds of dollars on a “loving gesture” for my children and the least I could have done was let them know about it."

The woman concluded the post, "I honestly couldn’t imagine keeping those toys, but I’d be lying if I said the amount of money spent on them didn’t make me feel guilty. AITA?"

Internet sides with original poster for donating the toys given by her stepmother

Several internet users agreed with the woman who made the AITA post and wrote that she immediately donated the gifts her stepmother bought for her children.

A user commented on the post, "NTA. It is indeed a manipulation tactic."

Another person added, "NTA this is why you are NC. A manipulative gesture. You did the right thing. Mary can get lost."

A user also wrote, "You feel guilty? So then you're saying her manipulation tactic worked. Stop right there. Don't feed into it. Don't let her win. Stay the course. NTA."

A person also chimed in, "NTA. Mary spent hundreds of dollars not on a “loving gesture” but on a manipulation tactic and it failed. She had been told where she stands and yet she is still flailing around like she’s lost. She isn’t she’s just trying to be the victim. Mary needs to move along and find some other outlet for her frustration."

Another Reddit user commented, "NTA. You didn’t waste them or throw them away, you donated them to children in need. If she’s so desperate for children interaction, I suggest volunteering. Your kids are not her muse."

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