'AITA for losing my sanity after my in-laws moved in for Christmas and took over my house for 3 weeks?'

A Reddit user, known as Past-Profit-614, turned to the platform's "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) forum for advice, expressing frustration after her in-laws moved in for Christmas and took over her home for three weeks.

She shared that the situation has caused her significant stress, even resulting in laryngitis and losing her voice.

OP overwhelmed by stress as in-laws take over her home for three weeks

The OP explained, "I'm one week into this nightmarish situation and I've already contracted laryngitis and completely lost my voice due to the stress."

The family members—her mother-in-law, sister-in-law, her 12-year-old son, and two dogs—"invited themselves to our house for Christmas and my husband allows them to stay for as long as they want," which has been particularly challenging given that this is her mother-in-law’s fourth visit this year, with one lasting over a month.

During their stay, her in-laws rearranged the plants in her garden without asking, believing they would grow better in a different spot. They also took her dogs' water bucket without permission and changed their eating area.

Additionally, they constantly left the gate open, which allowed her dogs to run into the street. Despite all of this, they haven't offered to cook a single meal, leaving her husband to do all the cooking and cover the bill when they eat out.

Her sister-in-law's dogs also chewed up all the toys meant for her dogs, and no one offered to replace them. Furthermore, her in-laws repeatedly pushed boundaries with her toddler, trying to convince him to do things he was uncomfortable with, even when she intervened.

She said she finds herself constantly repeating herself, waiting for her words to sink in.

Her husband, she claims, has shown little support, saying he's stressed out and doesn't want to "micro-manage" his family.

"My husband has told me he is stressed out because he doesn't want to have to 'micro-manage his family' in order to keep me happy," she wrote.

The OP feels her husband lacks the skills or courage to enforce boundaries with his family, leading to increased tension in their home.

She went on to explain, "I've snapped at him once for not making more of an effort to get them to respect the fact that this is our house and to be more mindful of living in our space, but I really think he just lacks the skills to communicate with them or he is afraid of what they will say."

Redditors rally behind OP as they urge her husband to enforce boundaries

Reddit users have weighed in on the OP's situation, with many empathizing with her frustrations and supporting her desire for boundaries and respect in her own home.

One user said, "NTA, and honestly, your husband needs to step up. It's not "micro-managing" to ask for basic respect in your own home. You're dealing with an unreasonable amount of chaos, and it's time for him to back you up before you lose more than your voice."

Another commented, "This right here! If hubby won't set boundaries, then OP can do it. 'Sorry, you can't stay for weeks. You need to leave after 1.' And 'you don't live here, stop rearranging things.' And for SIL 'I will venmo you the bill for new dog toys.'"

One person remarked, "It's not micromanaging, but if he phrases it that way, she seems like the problem. He knows exactly what they're doing, and he's not going to put a stop to it."

"NTA This is not really a MIL or SIL problem but a problem with communication and boundaries with your husband. Sit down with him and go over this together. Perhaps you two can formulate a compromise on these visits and discuss in advance how you two would ideally like to have them happen," another commented.

They further added, "Formulating the in advance an acceptable compromise would then only require him stating what is agreed upon in advance."

One individual said, "NTA. Three weeks sounds like a whole season of a reality show nobody asked for. Maybe it’s time for a fam meeting where you lay down some house rules? Or, like, a moat around the garden?"

Another added, "No more eating out! And tell hubby that the next time they ask to stay he has to repeat the following, ‘Let me just check that’s ok with wife’.  NTA"

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