'AITA for not taking out a loan for my mother so that she can give my teen brother a new car?'

When it comes to family, the line between support and financial responsibility can often blur.

For one 22-year-old on Reddit's 'Am I The A**hole' (AITA) forum, that line became all too clear when he asked, "AITA for not taking out a loan for my mother?"

Loan request from OP's mother for younger brother's car purchase

The Original Poster (OP) began his post by writing, "I’m a 22-year-old male living with my parents. Recently, my mother brought up the idea of taking out a loan in my name for my little brother (18m, call him LB for ease)."

On the surface, it might seem like a simple request—helping out family, being the responsible older sibling. But when money and family mix, things get complicated.

"As a background, I’m a full-time worker and I’ve been full-time since 18, first starting at a warehouse, and now working as a debt collector. I do contribute to my parents’ bills, even offering to help them with Internet bills, but they refuse. They only want my fortnightly payments, which I do make on time, never missing a day," OP explained.

Not only was he financially independent, but he was also actively supporting his household. And yet, his mother had a new request, one that could have lasting consequences.

"It has come to light recently that my car loan for my car is finishing up, with only $1,000 to go. I do have a trip overseas next month, so I’m also saving money for that too," he said.

Just when he was about to breathe a little easier, the pressure to take on more debt appeared. The reason? A new car for his younger brother.

OP informed, "My little brother doesn’t have a full license. In fact, he was still on a learner’s, so he still can’t drive yet."

OP reveals risks associated with taking a loan

The real kicker was when his mother wanted the loan in her eldest son's name.

"LB graduated high school last year, passing with flying colors, and none of us could be any more proud of him because he's done so much better than all of us. So much so that my mum wants to get a new car for him. The problem is, she wants me to take the loan out in my name for her because I have a better credit score than she does," he stated.

However, as someone who works in debt collection, he knew all too well the risks of taking out loans on behalf of others.

OP wrote, "I flat out refused because as I work in debt collecting, I see people take loans and credit for other people, and it never ends well for them. So I declined, citing the dangers of taking a loan out in my name." His refusal didn’t sit well with his mother.

He continued, "She said she wouldn’t help me out with anything anymore and called me an AH." Hence he was left wondering—did he do the right thing? Was standing his ground justified, or did he just let his mother down?

"I didn’t think it’s wrong for me to decline, especially in my field, but that is my mother asking me for help, which is the center of my conflict," he said.

The Internet declares: NTA

One Reddit user chimed in, "NTA. NEVER NEVER NEVER take a loan for others."

Another added, "NTA but your brother is 19 and doesn't need a brand new car. The insurance would probably be more than the car payment."

Someone else noted, "NTA. The gift to your brother is from your parent(s), not from you. She/they should be using their own credit, not yours, for this gift."

A viewer remarked, "NTA. I am in the "never cosign for anyone" school. It sounds like you mother wants to shirk ANY responsibility for paying back the loan by getting it in your name. He could get a job and save money to pay cash for the car, though that might take 10 years or longer. She and your brother should be told to pound sand. What are they going to do, disinherit you?"

One comment declared, "NTA. I'm Chinese, so I'm big on family loyalty, support, and all that stuff. Even so, I think it's entirely unfair for your mother to expect the loan to be made out in your name when they're expecting to buy an entirely new car. You're right -- it's never smart to take loans and credit for other people, and the fact that you have experience in this field gives your position all the more validity. She and your father are the parents; 22 or not, you are their child. It's wonderful that they're proud of your brother - as they should be! - but as parents, it is their obligation to provide financial support (if they want to buy him a new car) not yours.

I hope you don't feel pressured to carry the financial burden for them, no matter how much they may try and tell you're the a**hole in this situation (which you are most definitely not). Wishing you the best!"

Another observed, "NTA. The reason your mother has a low credit score is because she spends money on luxuries she can’t afford. The vast majority of 18-year-old do not have their own car. Your brother will be fine."

As one Reddit user explained, "NTA. If Mom wants to make a grand gesture and buy your brother a car, she can do so in her own name/credit.  If you took out the loan in your name and Mom couldn't pay, you would be screwed.  Nope."

This article contains remarks made on the Internet by individual people and organizations. MEAWW cannot confirm them independently and does not support claims or opinions being made online.