'AITA for snapping at my boyfriend for bringing a man into the bedroom while I was half asleep?'
A woman has narrated how she felt humiliated after her boyfriend brought a male visitor inside their bedroom when she was trying to sleep.
Taking to the AITA subsection of Reddit, the woman shared that since they have a spare bed frame, her boyfriend offered it to one of his acquaintances. But when the acquaintance came to see her bed when she was sleeping in her room, she snapped at her boyfriend for even allowing someone to enter her safe space.
Sharing her situation, the woman asked, “AITA for snapping at my boyfriend for bringing a man into the bedroom while I am trying to sleep?”
Redditor said her boyfriend allowed a man to enter her room when she was sleeping
The author shared that when her boyfriend bought a new bed from Amazon, one of the pieces had a crack in it. As her partner informed the customer care, Amazon sent them another set, essentially leaving them with two-bed frames.
However, when one day “an employee mentioned he was needing a new bed,” her boyfriend offered him the spare bed and he came to get it on the day when she wrote her post.
The OP informed, “I know this person and I do not like him for various reasons, my boyfriend told me the night before he was coming to get it. I said cool, I'm not coming out of the bedroom unless I have to.”
“He came and I vaguely heard them talking but I was half asleep and didn't care,” continued the OP, before adding, “Then I heard my boyfriend say something about showing him our bed, and I heard him say that I was in there but it was fine.”
This, however, did not sit well with the OP, as she shared, “I kinda froze, half asleep and confused until I hear them coming and I pulled the blankets over my head as my boyfriend announced coming in. I said very loudly "Why??" And they just came in.”
She shared that since she was wearing baggy clothes, she pulled down the blanket, only to see the man “just standing there in the doorway and awkwardly said good morning.”
Gingerly, she replied, while noting that she “probably looked like (she) wanted to kill everyone there.”
She also added that when the two men were leaving, she snapped at her boyfriend for not “shutting the door behind him on his way out.”
“Eventually the employee leaves and my boyfriend comes in and I immediately sat up and tell him i did not like that at all. He tries saying something in a sing song voice that may have been a half assed apology but I cut him off saying "I really didn't f***ing like that at all" and he turned around and left without a word.”
She continued that as she shut the door and lay there, felt like “just sort of locked up in place.”
“My whole body sort of just felt heavy and my chest hurt but I couldn't cry but that was just so... humiliating to have not only a man that does not belong in my bedroom there, but also him seeing me in my safe space an absolute mess from sleeping was just horrible,” added the OP.
The author continued that when she was finally getting up, her boyfriend sensed it and left without speaking a word. She added that later on she texted him “that since he decided to Irish Goodbye me after hurting me that bad, I'd take the couch tonight.”
When she came back home, she found her boyfriend asleep, thus resorted to take the couch from where she penned the entire post. She initially concluded, asking, “I want to know if I'm the asshole for how I reacted, because I have a feeling that's how he's going to twist it when he does, or if he does, say anything at all.”
She later gave an update as well, saying that she broke up with him.
“When he finally admitted he brought him in there to see the bed. He basically said all my reasoning for not being okay with it is stupid, that I was dressed and under a cover and it was fine,” added the author.
She further shared that her boyfriend “refused to see any wrong in his actions besides one brief admittedance that he could see how I was uncomfortable, but in the same breath said he couldn't imagine how I'd feel violated and thus wouldn't validate my feelings.”
She concluded, while informing the Redditors, “So I broke up with him, despite probably should have waiting until I was not at the end of the month and could more comfortably find a place to live.”
OP receives support from netizens for her complaint
The internet sided with the OP as they said the boyfriend was wrong in his decision to bring the visitor inside the bedroom.
One of the Redditors commented online, "NTA. Its ur bedroom, ur safe space. He had no right to bring someone in there while u were sleeping, esp someone u dont even like.He disrespected u big time. U need to have a serious talk with him abt boundaries and how hes making u feel."
Someone else said, "NTA I genuinely felt your emotions when I was reading that as if it was happening to me, what a strange violation."
"Only read the title and NTA," declared another user, before fuming, "How dare he bring another man in the bedroom when ur trynna sleep? Like what? What if u were wearing something u didnt want another man seeing u in???????"
Someone else claimed, "100% NTA. Everything about this is wrong. I don’t even let someone into the HOUSE while my wife is sleeping if she isn’t aware of it and in agreement, it’s just not cool. While I hate that these posts always go to “ditch the bf”, I do think you need to seriously consider this relationship and the behaviours he displays, there is so much wrong with it and honestly it doesn’t sound particularly safe if he thinks that’s ok."
"As a man, I would never do this to a woman. I would feel really uncomfortable. In a private space, your shared bedroom especially, this shouldn't even need clarification! NTA. I hope he shows some humility and apologizes without minimizing your discomfort. I would have a hard time trusting someone again if they did that to me," penned another angry user.
This article contains remarks made on the Internet by individual people and organizations. MEAWW cannot confirm them independently and does not support claims or opinions being made online
