'AITA if I told my boyfriend that I no longer find him physically attractive since he gained weight?'

Our partner should be our greatest supporter. However, in certain situations, it becomes quite difficult to deal with the feelings and emotions creating turmoil inside one's head. Redditor throwRAnyccity was essentially dealing with that when she shared that she is no longer "physically attracted" to her boyfriend since he has "gained quite a bit of weight."

Taking to Reddit's popular 'Am I the A**hole' (AITA) forum, the Original Poster (OP) expressed her concern in the post, titled, "WIBTA if I told my (23f) boyfriend (23m) that I am no longer attracted to him since he gained weight?" which garnered significant suggestions from the online community.

Woman shares she's no longer 'physically attracted' to her boyfriend 

The 23-year-old woman shared that she began dating her boyfriend, also 23, when they were 16-year-olds. She said that her man was "super active playing sports, going to the gym, eating healthy, etc. He was extremely fit as a result."

However, he has gained a significant amount of weight and is no longer as energetic as he once was. "I still love him and I feel awful for this but I’m not really physically attracted to him anymore," the OP expressed.

The OP expressed that however, she wouldn't end their relationship over this, but "health and fitness is really important to me and has always been growing up so this is a bit of a difficult situation for me."

Moreover, the woman shared that she "put a lot of work into trying to look good" both for herself and her boyfriend and sometimes feels that he does not do the same for her.

"In addition to losing my attraction, I’m also worried for his health. He also eats A LOT of junk food which can’t be good for his health, and I’ve seen it cause some issues," she added.

The boyfriend has been "trying to start going to the gym" because he "knows he’s gained the weight," and she deduced that "he thinks something should change as well but he’ll go like once a week then not go at all for weeks at a time so it’s not really working it seems."

Sharing her dilemma, the OP asked: "I’m not sure how to approach the situation? I know weight loss is tricky and it’s a personal decision so I don’t even know if it’s worth potentially hurting his feelings. So WIBTA if I said something about it? Or should I just keep it to myself?"

Internet users offer 'health and wellness' suggestions to OP

The Reddit community flocked to the comment section to offer various health and lifestyle suggestions to the OP as one wrote, "Consider a frame around his health and wellness and the compatibility with your lifestyle and goals, rather than his weight. IE 'I take cooking and eating healthy, exercise gym and walking as really important and I though this was important to you as well, what's changed here?' you might find that period was a short stint of healthy behaviour, and this is the real him. Then you've got a choice To make."

Another user suggested, "The conversation you need to have isn't with your boyfriend but with yourself. Can I spend the rest of my life with someone I only find attractive when they are young and slim? If the answer is no, move on. If the answer is yes, then accept him as he is. Absolutely it's fine for you to embody health affirming choices for your body, but it's up to him to decide whether or not to join you."

"Work, stress, mental health, and other problems. He may have a lot that he doesn't tell you about it. Have you ask him about this? For quality time you could go to the gym together or makes health recipes or go for a walk," said one Redditor.

Another added, "If it's a concern then communicate it to him. You can use other "arguments" - like "concerned about his health" etc. Invite him to walks, gym. He is your Partner , married or not. Support him."

"I mean you started dating as teenagers and now he's an adult. That happens. Teenage boys tend to be skinny then when they're around mid 20s, their metabolism bottoms out and they get fat. It's just normal for athlete teens who don't go on to pursue sports as an adult to go from in shape to blowing up for a while before they figure out they can't continue living the way they did. Aging sucks. But that's just life. I knew a dude who was already bald on top by 23. Be glad he's just fat," chimed in one.

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