AITA: Internet backs bride as she cuts off friend from life over behavior as maid of honor at her wedding

A Reddit user has shared her unpleasant experience with her maid of honor in a viral post on the "Am I the A**hole" forum, which has since garnered thousands of upvotes and comments.

The user explained that she was best friends with her maid of monor (MOH) for 14 years, but their relationship became strained amid her wedding planning due to her friend's lack of involvement and uncooperative behavior, as reported by Someecards.com.

Bride cuts off maid of honor out of her life after wedding drama

According to OP, the MOH had always been excited about the role, but soon after the engagement, she began expressing anxiety about not knowing how to fulfill the responsibilities, especially with tasks like the bridal shower and the bachelorette party.

"I’ve (F27) been best friends with my MOH (F28) for 14 years. Almost immediately after I got engaged, she started telling me that she had no idea how to do anything as a MOH and planning stressed her out, so matron of honor (F39) helped her," she wrote.

The OP continued, "I don’t want to give the impression that I forced her into the role and I see my wording may have suggested that. MOH was adamant about the role for years. She was ecstatic when I called and asked her, and immediately after the phone call posted publicly on social media that she was the MOH. She gave me the impression that all she needed was advice. She insisted on doing a bridal shower even though I told her it wasn’t necessary, and left everything to the Matron afterwards, which makes what happened all the weirder."

The OP noted that despite her reassurance, the MOH left nearly everything to the matron of honor, even though she had initially insisted on handling certain aspects herself.

"The matronOH ended up doing everything herself. My MOH basically burned bridges with everyone, for various reasons. Some people just found her annoying, others felt she came in with a diva attitude."

Things took a turn when the MOH became distant, with many of the OP’s friends finding her annoying and difficult to be around.

"She doesn’t really hang out with the rest of my friends and I was hoping my wedding would be an opportunity for her to get out and meet some new people but instead they want nothing to do with her," she writes.

The OP was particularly hurt when the MOH didn't show up for crucial moments during the wedding prep, including skipping the rehearsal dinner and being late the day of the wedding. The MOH arrived almost three hours late on the morning of the wedding, making an inappropriate comment about the drive.

"She went AWOL the week of when I asked her to come to my house to help make the flowers and dropped out of the rehearsal dinner AT THE REHEARSAL. I didn’t feel like begging my MOH to show up when she clearly didn’t want to be there. She was late on the morning of the wedding too."

The final straw came when, months later, the MOH requested another bachelorette party and then went radio silent for two weeks when the OP started planning it without her. This pattern continued with the MOH flaking on the OP’s birthday and showing little effort to meet halfway, which eventually led to a confrontation.

She wrote, "She got upset and asked why I was being this way and at that point I exploded and unloaded everything. I got a lot of “I’m sorry you feel that way,” and “this hearts my heart” but she stands by that she didn’t do anything wrong."

The OP expressed her frustration, and the MOH responded with vague apologies and deflections.

"Next morning she texts me that she’s so glad “we talked everything out." I lost it. I told her we didn’t talk, I talked at her while she sat there, and I didn’t want to see her until she owned up," she wrote.

Feeling unacknowledged and hurt by her best friend’s refusal to take responsibility, the OP ultimately decided to cut ties with the MOH for good.

Bride stands her ground and cuts off maid of honor, Internet backs her decision

The Reddit community overwhelmingly supported OP, with many users agreeing that the MOH's behavior was inconsiderate and that cutting her out of her life was a justified response. Some even argued that the MOH had been selfish and disrespectful, especially given the long-standing friendship they shared.

One user commented, "Definitely NTA has she ever acted like this in the past?"

Another added, "Nta why has she only been to your house 3 times in 14 years of friendship?!"

Another chimed in, adding, "NTA. I acted like your friend when I was drinking and having Dissociation (English not my first language, and that was the translation from my psychiatrist). If she’s like me than she needs professional help."

One user commented, "NTA. you aren’t dumping a friend “just over a wedding and a birthday” like first of all at least the wedding is a major milestone that any good friend and especially best friend should want to be there for, its not like she had some major complication or issue come up and couldn’t be there."

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