AITA: Internet labels man ‘walking red flag’ after he makes weird bedroom request to girlfriend in prenup

Having a prenup before tying the knot is no longer a new concept in today’s world. But when someone uses the concept of prenup to put shocking bedroom requests to his partner, it may come up as a “huge red flag.”

Something similar happened to a 34-year-old Reddit user when she was asked for marriage by her boyfriend, also 34. 

However, contrary to the age-old method of wooing one’s lady to take her to the marriage bed, this man took the controversial approach of dictating the number of times they should be intimate during their marriage each week. 

Adding to the owes of his girlfriend who discussed the bizarre situation in a Reddit thread, the man wanted to put the clause in a prenup, adding the lady would get “absolutely nothing in the divorce” if she doesn’t comply.

Author discusses bizarre prenup conditions her boyfriend puts on her

“I honestly can't believe I'm asking this, but my boyfriend has gotten so mad that I'm feeling a little crazy now,” started the original poster in the thread. 

Giving the background to her boyfriend’s situation, she shared, “He had a terrible marriage before me that ended in a dead bedroom, and he's determined to never go back to that life again.”

While the OP claimed to understand her boyfriend’s ordeal, she shared that because of his past experiences, he was putting shocking demands on her. 

“So now he wants a prenup and literally write in the pernup that we will have sex x amount of times a week, or else I get absolutely nothing in the divorce,” added the author.

Later in the post, he revealed that though she “had already agreed to a 50/50 prenup of marital assets, and we keep what we came into the marriage with,” her boyfriend was not satisfied. 

The author continued, “He wants me to "prove" that I won't stop having sex with him in the future. I tell him I can't prove the future, and putting something in writing doesn't prove that.”

As the OP refused to agree to her boyfriend’s terms, the man tried to give guilt trips to the woman. 

“Now he says I must have a guilty conscience if I won't sign these terms, because if I'm so certain it won't happen, then what's the problem?” wrote the OP, before explaining to the Reddit community her reason, “But to me, it makes me feel like a s*x slave and not a loved wife or partner.”

While marriage between two spouses is usually based on love, respect, and trust for each other, the OP’s boyfriend’s extreme approach did not sit well with the Redditors. 

Many termed him to be the ‘walking red flag’ - rightfully so because of his obnoxious demands - and asked the OP to run away from the relationship. 

One Redditor even asked whether the boyfriend had any attorney to make the prenup legal. 

Then the OP revealed even more disturbing information, saying, “No, he doesn't have a lawyer. But did say when it comes to signing it, he wants a psychiatrist present to witness that I'm not being coerced and can't claim it later.”

She went on to elaborate, “Like...this literally came out of nowhere last night. I was just at work and asked him if everything was okay because he's been feeling distant lately, but he's got a rough semester right now getting his second Masters, and then just got avalanched with all this.”

Internet warned the OP against her 'walking red flag' boyfriend

Netizens could not contain their astonishment at the preposterous suggestion as they termed OP's boyfriend to be "a walking red flag."

One of the Redditors asked in bewilderment, "Its crazy. I would also ask what happens if he gets prostate cancer and can no longer perform after surgery? Does that mean he gets nothing?" before adding, "The guy needs counseling."

Someone else also added that he needed "professional help," saying, "NTA he is not ready to be a partner and needs (professional) help to get past his last relationship trauma. The end of s*x was a symptom and he needs to understand what caused it. I’m guessing his mentality of being owed probably contributed. S*x WILL stop at some point if you get sick, or old enough, or just plain exhausted."

Another social media user chimed in, "And you still want to marry him? Good luck with that," before declaring, "Prenup aside this man is a walking red flag."

"NTA. I can 100% see why he had a dead bedroom in the last marriage," mused another user before adding, "You need to carefully consider this man’s historical behaviour. He’s not normal."

Someone else suggested she should run away from her boyfriend, saying, "You should be done anyway. The fact that he would even think of something like this screams run. The part about having a psychiatrist witness is particularly disturbing. He's not in touch with reality. No attorney or psychiatrist would touch this with a ten meter cattle prod, and neither should you."

"The fact that he even thinks like this is a huge red flag," commented another before slamming the OP, "You’re nuts if you marry him."

This article contains remarks made on the Internet by individual people and organizations. MEAWW cannot confirm them independently and does not support claims or opinions being made online.