AITA: Man wonders if he's wrong for cutting ties with 'friend' who racially abused him at restaurant

On the never-ending Reddit’s "Am I The A--hole" forum, one man’s post is making waves after he asked the internet if he was wrong for cutting ties with a "so-called friend" who unleashed a racist tirade at him and a waitress.

The Original Poster (OP), a 28-year-old man of Japanese descent, took to Reddit to air out the jaw-dropping incident in a thread titled, "AITAH for refusing to talk to my 'friend' after she racially abused me in a restaurant?"

The racist rant that sparked it all

During what was supposed to be a regular group outing at a restaurant, his 32-year-old “friend” hurled derogatory racial slurs at both him and the waitress.

He began, "The title pretty much sums it all up. My 'friend' (F32) called me (M28) several derogatory Asian racial slurs and even told me and my waitress that all of 'you people' look the same. She also told myself and the waitress to 'go back to China' despite us both being Japanese."

"There was a few of us in the group and she laughed hysterically after saying these disgusting things to myself and the waitress. Nobody else laughed and a few of our friends left the restaurant. It has been a few days now and I haven't spoken to her since," he continued.

While OP understandably decided to ghost the woman, she didn’t take the hint. Instead, she bombarded his phone with insults, claiming it was his fault for not “being a man about it” and calling him “a baby.”

"None of our friends are talking to her and she says that it's my fault for 'being a baby' and told me to 'be a man about it' but honestly, I'm tired of it," he wrote, adding "I have experienced casual racism all my life, but I never expected to recieve it from someone I used to value a lot."

"My friends and I haven't spoken to her since, but she is blowing up my phone calling me names and digging herself an even bigger hole. AITAH for ignoring her? Should I talk to her about it, or educate her on slurs? Please let me know," he concluded.

Redditors come to the man's rescue

Of course, Reddit’s finest rallied around OP.

"NTA. She’s not your friend. Don’t bother explaining anything to her, she has already shown her inability to understand your feelings about it," one Redditor posted.

"NTA. Her racist remarks were totally uncalled for and unjustifiable," another offered. "You're not 'being a baby' at all; you're simply asking for the same respect everyone else gets, which you also deserve," one said.

"And my god, telling a Japanese person to go back to China? That's gotta be the absolute worst. That's a whole other country with a whole other culture, and the comment shows that your 'friend' is not only a racist, but also totally stupid," they added.

"Nah bro you’re not the asshole. She literally dropped racist slurs and tried to blame you for not taking it like a champ? That’s not a friend, that’s a walking red flag," someone else wrote. "You don’t owe her any 'education' or a chance to justify her trash behavior. Block her, keep your distance, and move on. Your peace is way more important than dealing with her bigotry," one opined.

"NTA. This person sucks and nobody should need to 'educate' a grown woman in 2024 about why racial slurs are bad," read a comment.

"Also, 'be a man about it'? Gross. Is having the expectation of common decency just for women? If you feel she needs an actual talking to, maybe one of your friends who she isn't going to wield racist or sexist remarks against can do it. You're totally in the right to ghost this jerk," the commentator added.

"I wouldn't bother talking to her. Just block her and move on. She's not worth the effort. I'm sorry you believed she was - at least not THAT person - somebody different. I'm sure that was a nasty feeling, and embarrassing, too, that she was abusing you and the waitress when you were there with her at the restaurant. Yuck. Just gross," another chimed in.

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