'AITA for accepting inheritance from my deadbeat father despite my mother’s disapproval?'
When faced with a tough decision between accepting an inheritance that could launch his future or honoring his mother's wish, a teenager turns to the Internet for guidance.
Recently, a 19-year-old man turned to the AITA section of Reddit to share his dilemma after receiving an inheritance from his absentee biological father who had been absent from his life for years.
The original poster (OP) shares that he “barely” remembers his biological father, with his last memory being of his father yelling at his mother when he was around six years old, and hiding under the kitchen table.
Author says his alcoholic father gave him property
The author recalled his traumatic childhood, claiming his father “was a terrible man with an alcohol problem.”
He continued, “One day he fled the country and was never seen again, my mother met my stepfather who is a great man, and raised me as his own kid.”
However, their peaceful life suffered a blow when the OP received “a formal notice” from his biological father, informing him that the OP’s grandmother had died.
The OP continued, “He didn't expect me to go to the funeral, as I did not even know the lady, but decided to pass her apartment to me, as he was never part of my life, it is least he can do.”
The author added, “He doesn't expect me to contact him or anything, he wrote that he knows how terrible he was and nothing can excuse that.”
As the OP was excited about the opportunity, he shared the news to his family but was met with a disappointing response.
“I was excited about the fact that I could start my life way easier and told my family about it and they got really mad at me, telling me how terrible person he was and all, and that is all true!” wrote the OP.
He shared, “My mother said that he is probably using that to contact me or even worse, use it to claim that he took care of me so I have to take care of him when he is old!”
The young man shared that following the scuffle, he took legal advice from a lawyer who assured him that it wouldn’t further cause trouble.
“So I talked with a pro bono lawyer about it and she told me that accepting an inheritance can't be considered paying child support (which he never did),” noted the OP, before adding, “So if I decide to accept the apartment, it does not oblige me to anything.”
However, his parents were still mad at him, “My stepfather says I should honour my mother's wish and not accept it, while I believe that it would be stupid to say no and deny a chance to start my life a bit easier than others my age.”
He finally concluded the post, writing, “AITA for accepting that apartment?”
As the internet was concerned with the OP’s well-being, some of the social media users suggested he ensure that the property does not come with further financial entailments.
That was when the OP shared in a reply, “Yes, there were some unpaid bills as she died and did not pay bills after that! But the money in her bank account was enough to cover it. This is why I talked with a lawyer,” wrote the OP, who added that the lawyer made sure he would be safe even if he accepted the property.
Internet urges OP to accept inheritance despite his parents' disapproval
The netizens unanimously concluded that the OP is not an a**hole for accepting the property despite her parents repeatedly urging him not to accept. However, the Redditors also advised him to cover all the bases to ensure that there are no legal loopholes that could cause his money to drain.
One of the social media users validated the OP's situation and claimed, "Honey, if anyone needs to accept an inheritance, it’s the child of a deadbeat dad. Be cautious; I can understand your parents’ concerns. I also wonder if they’re worried you might feel some care for your father because he let you know of the inheritance and it will lead you to seek a relationship with him. However, they also advised him to clear confusion with his parents, saying, "Remind them they are the best parents in the world and you have no desire to replace them. Happy life my dear ❤️."
Someone else noted, "NTA - I think you’re on the right track. Accept the tainted apartment, then sell it and use that money to buy whatever it is you need the most, like college, a car, your education - or another apartment. Just remember that it is once in a lifetime money and treat it accordingly."
Another Redditor asked the OP, "Are you sure your dad refused the apartment? Could his mom have left it to you herself and he is just taking credit for it?" However, the author replied to the post, clarifying that his father indeed refused the inheritance. He wrote, "Yes, I am sure because I can look up all the documentation. There is document from my real father refusing the inheritance, so I am next in line and the only living relative after my father."
"NTA - make sure you cover all your legal bases and make sure bio Dad doesn’t have any kind of legal loopholes to have access to the apartment once you take ownership," added someone else, before suggesting, "Make sure you can afford any taxes and insurance on the place. Then take it. Never give up organic opportunities just out of spite. Life is hard enough. Sounds like yours was worse than most. No reason to let pride or misguided righteousness hold you back further."
Another user claimed to understand the mother's concerns, as they wrote, "NTA. I understand your mum's concerns, and it's important that you reassure her that you won't let that guy worm his way into your life, but at the end of the day it's not reasonable to expect you to refuse a free apartment with no perceptible strings attached."
This article contains remarks made on the Internet by individual people and organizations. MEAWW cannot confirm them independently and does not support claims or opinions being made online.
