'AITA for being worried about my boyfriend who disappears for hours during his walks?'
A 36-year-old woman turned to Reddit for advice after growing concerned about her boyfriend’s unusual habit.
The Original Poster, under the username _BoatyMcBoatFace, wrote on Reddit’s 'Am I The A*****e' (AITA) forum, “Me and my boyfriend (37M) have been together five years. He has extreme anxiety and panic attacks and will take long walks to calm down which I am supportive of.”
The woman, however, revealed that her boyfriend’s walks have “turned into other adventures” many times and he does not even care to inform her.
Woman questions if she’s ‘controlling’ for worrying about boyfriend who disappears for hours
She continued, “I have woken up at 3 am, 5 am or even 8 am the next morning to find him still not home. After worried and frantic calls he will reluctantly answer and make me out to be unreasonable and controlling.”
The OP also stated that after looking out for him, she’s found him at weird places, like “bars that are closed, at a hotel across town with random people, friends houses I do not know, breakfast and drinks with strangers, a 55-year-old woman’s house having a ‘heart to heart’, parties with strangers he met on his walk.”
“AITA for being worried and angry when he doesn’t communicate where he is going / if his walks turn into hangouts with friends? I think it’s extremely disrespectful, he says I’m being controlling,” she mentioned at the end of her post.
Reddit users tell woman her boyfriend is ‘not acting like a healthy partner’
People in the comment section understood the OP’s point of view as one Redditor commented, “Nta. These supposed walks ending in unlikely-to-actually-be-random places are not about his preventing panic attacks. There’s a lot more deception going on than you think, and his defensiveness and comments about your perfectly reasonable, normal question/worrying being too controlling are another tip off. Affairs? Addiction? Does it matter? Because bottom line he’s not being honest and is gaslighting you. 🚩🚩🚩He’s not acting like a healthy partner at all and he doesn’t seem like he even cares to be one. Your instincts are sounding alarms, you know what you already know, that this is not in your head.”
Another Redditor said, “NTA. You're not being controlling. Going for a walk and ending up in a bar - repeatedly - is not how you deal with panic attacks. Nor is going home with strangers. This behaviour is so odd - what else is going on? Surely this isn't the only anomaly in an otherwise great relationship?”
A third one posted, “NTA - this man is acting like an indoor/outdoor cat, not a boyfriend of five years.”
“Who goes for a 5-7 hour walk?... He's def going somewhere,” an individual remarked.
Another posted, “NTA but has your boyfriend considered that drinking won't help the anxiety and or panic?”
A comment read, “NTA As someone who likes to go on long walks. That sounds sketchy as f**k.”
This article contains remarks made on the Internet by individual people and organizations. MEAWW cannot confirm them independently and does not support claims or opinions being made online.
