'AITA for considering canceling my wedding because my fiance killed my plants?'

A strong relationship thrives on mutual support and respect, but the absence of either can lead to doubts about the connection.

One couple faced a similar challenge when the groom neglected the bride's plants while she was away. When she voiced her frustration, he brushed off her concerns, labeling her reaction as excessive.

Conflicted, she sought advice on Reddit, wondering if she was wrong to consider canceling the wedding.

Woman left upset after fiance failed to save her plants

In a Reddit post by Popular-Doughnut3005, the bride shared her love for plants, explaining, "I have been away visiting my parents in a different city and I have 2 plants back home which are water propagated."

She detailed the responsibility given to her fiance, saying, "So basically he didn’t even have to water them, just keep their containers filled and he still let the water dry out and my plants died." 

The bride expressed her frustration, adding, "I’m genuinely so upset that I want to call off the wedding and he thinks that it’s not a big deal and that I’m overreacting over nothing." 

She further explained, "This isn’t the first time he’s done this and I forgave him last time because it was his first time taking care of a demanding plant but now he’s been seeing me grow these plants for the past 2 years yet he still didn’t care to keep the containers filled."

OP reveals current state of mind regarding her marriage

In a follow-up to her post, the bride expressed gratitude for the responses she received, saying, "Wow, I really didn’t expect this post to blow up like it did—thank you to everyone who took the time to comment and reading through the replies, I think I’ve unintentionally written one of the most polarising posts on this sub lol. I just want to clarify a few things." 

She went on to explain her state of mind, "I didn’t mean to imply that I’m going to make a huge decision like calling off the wedding instantly, I wrote this post in a moment of frustration and hurt and I felt so disrespected because I’ve put a lot of time and care into these plants and it felt like such a small simple thing to just keep the containers filled while I was away."

She admitted, "This wasn’t just about the plants—it’s about what they represented: trust, care, effort. It stung even more because this isn’t the first time something like this has happened. I made this post because I felt unheard and needed to vent about how I was feeling in the moment."

She concluded, "As of now, my fiance did give me an overall apology and said he’d buy me new plants, but I’m still waiting for a proper meaningful apology where he truly acknowledges why this hurt me so much. I haven’t decided anything yet and I just need time to think and process everything. Again, thanks to everyone for sharing their perspectives—it’s given me a lot to think about."

Internet supports woman deciding not to marry fiance who killed her plants

After learning about the woman's situation and her thoughts of calling off the wedding, several Redditors quickly shared their perspectives to encourage the OP to reconsider. 

One user wrote, "I mean, if this makes you not want to marry him then yeah man call off the wedding. Nobody should marry someone they don't want to marry even if it is for an unusual reason. NTA."

A second user added, “NTA, him not respecting your things and feelings are a red flag. Because would he do this still after getting married? Would be fully contribute to housework? If you two have children, would he be an equal parent and do his part?

Another suggested, “NTA It's not about plants but what they mean to you. They were something that you cared for and invested your time and energy in. It's the fact he can't see and respect something that was important to you.”

One praised her, "NTA he thinks that it’s not a big deal and that I’m overreacting over nothing No respect, no guilt. Good call to not marry him." The other commented, "NTA, you know he did it on purpose, right ?" 

Another commented, "NTA. He did it before. He did it again. He couldn't even be bothered to check the water? What else doesn't he bother doing? This seems like a problem that isn't going to go away."

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