‘AITA for naming our baby after my grandmother while husband was on a coffee break in the hospital?’

A 32-year-old woman shared her dilemma about naming her newborn daughter after her late grandmother, despite ongoing disagreements with her husband.

The post, shared on the popular r/AmItheA**hole forum under the username zabriskie_point, describes the tension surrounding the decision-making process leading up to the birth of their first child.

Woman names daughter after late grandmother while husband steps out

According to the OP, her grandmother, who had been a pivotal figure in her life, died the year before the pregnancy, and naming her daughter after this woman felt deeply important. "She was my hero, and losing her last year was devastating," the woman wrote.

The desire to honor her grandmother was clear, but the issue arose when her husband, 33, pushed for more modern names like Nova or Ember.

The couple, who had been in a back-and-forth over names for months, couldn’t reach a compromise.

The woman explained, "I really wanted to name her Eleanor, after my late grandmother who basically raised me when my parents weren’t around."

However, her husband was less enthusiastic about the name, calling it "'old-fashioned".

The situation came to a head during labor when the woman was asked by a nurse if they had decided on a name for the birth certificate. Her husband had stepped out to grab a coffee, leaving her alone with the decision.

The OP admitted, "I know I should have waited, but I was emotional and felt this rush of conviction. I just blurted out 'Eleanor'."

When her husband returned and found out, he was furious. "He said I’d blindsided him, robbed him of having a say, and that our daughter would hate her “old lady” name," the woman explained.

Her husband’s reaction, combined with criticism from his family, made her second-guess her decision. "His family is also calling me manipulative," she said.

Despite her husband’s anger, the woman stands by her choice. "I feel terrible about the timing and how it all went down, but it’s not like we hadn’t discussed Eleanor before," she reasoned.

She added, "I just feel like I honored a name that truly mattered to me when he wouldn’t budge."

"AITA for finalizing the name while he was out, or is he overreacting given we couldn’t find common ground?" she asked while ending her post.

Internet slams woman's decision to finalize baby's name without husband's consent

While the OP stood by her choice, the Reddit community was not convinced, with many criticizing her decision to finalize the name without her husband's consent to it.

A user wrote, "YTA. You made a unilateral decision about your shared child. You literally started her life by using her as a centerpiece for conflict with your husband. You also isolated her from your husband during the first major decision regarding her. What a terrible way to start her life."

They further added, "Also, Nova is an incredibly old-fashioned name. My grandmother would be in her 90s if she was still alive, and her name was Nova. That's not a slight against your husband - just an additional comment."

Another added, "YTA and a huge one. Names are a 2 yes decision. He’s absolutely right, you stole the decision."

The third commentator remarked, "YTA, snd if you value your relationship with your husband at all, you should offer to change your baby’s name ASAP to something you both agree on. Otherwise he is going to be reminded of what a sneaky, underhanded and untrustworthy human you are every time he looks at your daughter."

"YTA so he just didn't get a say in naming the child he's gonna help you raise for the next 20 something odd years? At all? Yeah, that's kinda f**ked up," criticized one.

A person said, "Yeah YTA. You should have told the nurse that you’re still deciding."

Another chimed in, "YTA! "We discussed Elenore", and he said no. Names are a two yes, one no deal. Your child is hours old and you're already making important parenting decisions without taking your husband's feelings into consideration. YTA."

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