‘AITA for not getting my husband’s name tattooed on my neck despite his insistence?’

A Reddit user recently shared her sister's story of a disagreement with her husband over tattoos. Married for 10 years and together for 20, the woman has always been clear about her stance on tattoos, she has no interest in inking her partner's name on her body. 

Tension started when her husband showed her a video of a woman getting her partner’s name tattooed and asked if she would do the same for him. When she firmly refused, an argument broke out, and her husband became distant and upset. Despite the tension, she stands by her belief that marriage is about more than just tattoos and refuses to give in to his demands.

Woman refuses to get her husband's name tattooed despite his repeated insistence

A Reddit user, under the name MinxisJinxed, shared her sister’s story on the 'Am I the A**hole' forum, using fake names for privacy. The sister, Mary, has been married for 10 years, and in high school, she made a personal promise never to tattoo her partner’s name on her body.

“And since high school I’ve made a promise to myself that I would NEVER tattoo my partners name anywhere on me. That’s the only thing I couldn’t do," the post stated.

The conflict arose when her husband, Tanner, showed her a video of a woman getting her partner's name tattooed in the middle of her chest.

The post described, “As he’s showing me the picture, he has a huge smile on his face, watching for my reaction as I watched the video on his phone. After the video ended, I just sat there speechless, looking at him like he had two heads. It was just silent, until he asked me if I would ever do that for him."

Mary politely expressed her disagreement, but her husband became upset. The post continued, “His smile immediately dropped when I said that, and he asked me why not. I told him that I told him before I would never get anyone but my child’s name tatted on me. He said that was stupid and that him and the child should be given the same treatment. I told him it wasn’t the same. The going back and forth broke out a small argument before he stormed out of the house.”

Mary didn’t bother checking where her husband went, suspecting he went to his father’s or sister’s house. A few days later, she received a call from her husband’s friend, Henry, who scolded her with derogatory terms. “I didn’t care why he had my number, but I was aware he called me names,” she said.

Later, she spoke with her husband who continued to demand, “Why can’t my name get tatted? We’ve been married for years. Why can’t you fully commit to me?”

She responded that she had already committed to him through marriage. Tanner insisted that a tattoo would make him feel more loved.

The woman emphasized that marriage is about more than tattoos, and despite her husband’s silence and distance since the argument, she refused to give in to his demands.

“I’m not about to lose my marriage over this, but I’m also not going to give in to tattooing his name on me just because he won’t speak to me over it," Mary asserted.

Redditors back woman who refused to get her husband's name tattooed

Upon learning about the couple's disagreement over tattoos, fellow Redditors sided with the woman and slammed the husband's "unrealistic" demand.

One user wrote, "NTA it’s your body and your expression of art. He is controlling you - he literally wants to brand you like a cow for slaughter. Plot twist: “Henry” is actually your man name calling you from an anon number."

Another user shared, "He wants you to be an Instagram girl! His wants are unrealistic/unreasonable because he spends too much time on social media. Imo"

One user suggested, "NTA. He is. I would divorce him before I would tattoo his name on me."

A user stated, "Nta. Don't ever get a romantic partners name tatted unless they have passed on. Otherwise, just no. It doesn't show commitment. Your husband is out of line for letting someone talk to you like that. What is this dude hiding ?"

A comment read, "NTA! He let his best friend say all that to you? And thinks a name tattooed on you means full commitment? Like the last 10 years of marriage meant nothing?! I’d pack up his crap and tell him to go stay with his POS friend. Block his friend."

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