'AITA for refusing to attend my brother's wedding after he started dating my ex who cheated on me?'

A 25-year-old man, who goes by the username AlternativeLivid3451 on Reddit's r/AITAH, has sparked a heated family debate after refusing to attend his brother's wedding

The reason? His brother, 26, is marrying the same woman who cheated on him during their five-year relationship, which ended three years ago.

OP's painful breakup takes darker turn when his brother dates his ex

In his post, OP explains the painful details of his breakup. He caught his ex, 24,  cheating when one of her friends revealed that she had been hooking up with random guys at clubs while they were together.

OP wrote, "I broke up with her that night... we'd been planning to move in together, and she was cheating on me almost every week." Despite his long-time love for her, OP doesn’t believe his ex ever truly loved him, and the betrayal has left lasting emotional scars.

After the breakup, things got even more complicated when OP’s brother started dating his ex. “My brother had a long-time girlfriend when I was with my ex, and when they broke up last year, he started dating my ex,” OP added.

Understandably, this upset him, and when he confronted his brother, the conversation took a harsh turn. His brother dismissed OP’s feelings, telling him, "Grow up... I don’t owe you anything."

While OP’s sisters (22 and 29) stand by him, feeling that his brother's actions are a betrayal, the rest of the family—including his parents and other brothers—are urging him to "let it go" and support the wedding.

OP, however, isn’t willing to budge. When his brother asked him to help with the wedding planning, OP refused, stating, "I told everyone I’m not going or helping."

The tension reached a boiling point when OP compared the situation to his brother marrying his ex: "I asked him how he'd like for me to find his ex and marry her," to which his brother countered, "that's different and their breakup was different."

OP continued, “I told him he was marrying the woman who cheated on me, and he doesn't see why that would p**s me off."

Despite the pressure from his family to reconcile and support his brother’s choice, OP stands firm, writing, "I'm standing my ground, as are my sisters." While some family members have supported his stance, others believe he’s being too harsh, telling him to "just let it go" and that he should be “happy” for his brother.

The situation has caused a rift in the family, with OP caught between his personal sense of betrayal and the expectations of his relatives.

Reddit users overwhelmingly back OP

The majority of Reddit users supported OP's decision, empathizing with his feelings of betrayal and acknowledging that his brother’s actions were disrespectful. Many felt OP was justified in standing his ground, prioritizing his emotional well-being over family pressure.

A user said, "NTA. & to be totally crass...updateme when he discovers her cheating."

Another added, "She's prob already cheating. Honestly, I think she's using the brother as a way to get back with OP. Brother is stupid as hell....I'd be suspicious of a sibling's ex just all the sudden wanting to be around me."

A third commented, "Not the AH - Give your brother a large box of penicillin as a wedding present then wait for him to come crying to you when she cheats. Once a cheater......."

"NTA. Just tell your brother you're showing him the same loyalty he and your cheating ex showed you: none. It's disappointing that your parents and other brothers support this," said one.

A person suggested, "NTA. You and your sisters should plan some trip for that weekend and just leave town...."

Another added, "NTA The fact he expects his family to help with his wedding to someone who hurt someone else in the family is laughable."

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