AITA: Girlfriend gets Internet support as she ruins 'surprise’ her boyfriend planned for her birthday

A woman has shared her story of apparently being nasty about her own birthday surprise planned by her boyfriend. But people on the Internet did not think so and backed her for her behavior.

The 23-year-old unnamed woman, under the username GrapefruitApologist, wrote on Reddit's popular 'Am I The A*****e' subreddit' that she and her 26-year-old boyfriend have been together for “a little over eight months.”

She revealed that in “early November it was my birthday. I was excited, as it was the first time we were going to be spending either of our birthdays together, and he had spent all of October teasing a ‘surprise’ he was planning.”

In the Reddit post, the woman noted that she does not share a good relationship with her parents and they have not been part of her life “for the past two years”.

Reddit user’s boyfriend brought her parents as surprise for her birthday

She mentioned that her boyfriend knew about her estrangement from her parents. She also said that she considers her best friend her family now.

“So, when my boyfriend let it slip on my birthday that the surprise he had planned was a family dinner, I had sort of assumed it meant my sister and her husband, and my friend and her partner. I was wrong,” the woman posted.

Her boyfriend actually planned to fly her parents “from a whole different city.”

“I was confused as to why he would bring them, but I might have overreacted. I don’t think I even stayed there for more than thirty minutes before I walked out of the restaurant and drove home,” she stated.

Woman’s boyfriend failed to understand her point of view

The woman said that she was expecting an apology from her boyfriend the next day when he came to meet her but instead, he “got angry at me for ‘ruining the surprise’ he had been planning for a long time, and he said he just wanted to give me a chance to have a normal relationship with my parents.”

Concluding her post, GrapefruitApologist added, “I understand where he is coming from, I guess, but I really didn’t appreciate the way he went about it. I told him this, and he wasn’t really receptive,” before asking her fellow Reddit users, “So, am I the asshole for ruining my birthday surprise?”

Redditors slam woman’s boyfriend and her parents

Soon people came in her support online, with one Redditor commenting, “NTA. He decided after 8 months that he knows better for you in relation to your parents than you, who has known them her whole life, do. Massive, massive red flags before we even look at his reaction to you rightly leaving that situation. He didn't apologise for the betrayal, for the misjudgement, for ruining your birthday. Instead he blamed you and centred himself, on your fucking birthday. Run, don't walk, away from this one. I'm really sorry you were put on that position.”

Another Redditor said, “NTA. Your boyfriend AND your parents are. The only people that ruined anything were your parents and your boyfriend. Instead of making up with you your parents continue their bad behaviour. Instead of standing up for you, your boyfriend allows their bad behaviour. Your boyfriend does NOT have a right to know your parents when you removed them from your life. Then instead of seeing what shitty people they are, your boyfriend thinks you still need to have a ‘normal’ relationship with them. You deserve a man, not a bratty little boy who thinks you did anything wrong. Give yourself an early Christmas present and dump him.”

“Omigosh. You're so NTA. Your boyfriend however. . . I suspect this isn't the first time he's disrespected you. He has no ‘right’ to know your parents, your siblings, your friends, your bank balance, or even your favorite color. Does he always make everything about him?” a person posted.

The second one wrote, “You need a new boyfriend. Dump the man. You don't want to be with anyone that stupid. NTA.”

A reaction read, “NTA I am no contact with my mother. If someone close to me did this I would never forgive them. Run for the hills, before you end up with a partner that disrespects you in the same way your parents did.”

Another netizen said, “NTA Your boyfriend is giving very entitled/controlling vibes. Sure, he ‘has the right to want to know them’ (lol) just as much as anyone has the right to want anything. I want to meet a bunch of famous people and I sure as hell have the right to want it, but I’m not going to become a stalker to make it happen. Is this a relationship ender? Probably, especially given his lack of remorse and understanding that what he did was very much out of line.”

“This person has no consideration for you and your feelings. The disrespect is astounding. You’re NTA but he certainly is. Hope you’re rethinking the relationship,” a comment read.

This article contains remarks made on the Internet by individual people and organizations. MEAWW cannot confirm them independently and does not support claims or opinions being made online