AITA: Internet backs man who tells girlfriend he can’t trust her after she secretly terminates pregnancy

Trust is the most important factor in a relationship and there should always be transparency between the two people. However, many times people tend to hide certain things in a relationship and it affects them badly once the truth comes out.

Recently, a 28-year-old man on Reddit's "Am I the A*****e" forum shared an incident where he revealed that he told his girlfriend he could not trust her after finding out she ended pregnancy following a big family announcement.

Couple announces pregnancy to friends and family

The man wrote on the Reddit post that he has been dating his girlfriend (26F) for 4 years. He added that she told him she always wanted children and they just didn’t actively try for one though. He also said that he never pressured her into having a baby and it was more so her idea. He mentioned that he makes enough and they own a home so having a baby is something they can afford to do.

He wrote, "So, to clarify, I’m not mad at her for this. I’m extremely concerned and I feel like everything she has said about her wanting a baby was a lie. Abortion is also legal up to 21 weeks of pregnancy in our state."

The man continued, "So she told me she was pregnant, she was having symptoms and took a test. She was happy about it and excited. I was happy as well and offered to make an appointment for her. We both went together and she was 6 weeks pregnant. We have been planning, she even told her friends and family."

However, the man revealed that she ended up having a miscarriage at around 9 weeks. He explained that it was sudden and she was upset and he comforted her about it. It seemed very tough for her so he did his best to try and make her feel better.

Man finds truth behind her girlfriend's miscarriage

He continued in the Reddit post and wrote that he had to retrieve something from a drawer in their bedroom and found some herbs covered under a bag. He revealed it was pennyroyal and mugwort and he was confused because he had heard of pennyroyal being used to cause self-abortions.

The man wrote, "I asked her about it and she immediately became defensive and told me that she didn’t know where it came from. I kept trying to ask her about it and she ended up telling me she used it to have a miscarriage. She was crying and I was just in shock."

He further mentioned, "I ask her why? I told her she didn’t have to lie to me about it and I’m confused because she was the one who really wanted a baby? She didn’t give me an answer about it. I told her that we need to go to the hospital to make sure she isn’t hurt, since pennyroyal is toxic but she kept declining."

The man continued in the post that it’s been a few days and his girlfriend seems fine. He added that he has been trying to ask her about this but she just says she doesn’t want to talk about it. He also mentioned that apparently, she was telling her friends and family she had a miscarriage and has been accepting condolences.

The dejected man wrote, "She’s avoiding this but I don’t want to push it towards her anymore. I’m not too sure what to do about this because I’m worried she might be having some type of mental breakdown or something. I eventually told her that she should not tell me about having a baby again, and I can’t trust her about it anymore."

He concluded the post, "She was upset hearing that but what else could I say about something like this? This might make me a huge AH, but in the back of my mind has been thinking she might have did this for attention from her friends and family? Idk what to do and I feel like a horrible person for even thinking this stuff."

Internet sides with man who finds out his girlfriend ended pregnancy

Several internet users sided with the man who posted on Reddit that he told his girlfriend he could not trust her after finding out she ended pregnancy following a big family announcement.

A user commented on the post, "NTA - huge waving red flag. Run."

Another one added, "This would be breakup territory me… NTA."

A person also stated, "NTA - your gf is a red flag and it might be time to reassess this relationship as I don’t think it’s as healthy as you may think."

Whereas, one mentioned, "NTA. But she is. I wouldn't trust her anymore either. I would also be packing her bags for her to move out."

A user also wrote, "Nta. Walk away from someone so manipulative."

Another person commented, "NTA. What you do is you BREAK UP WITH HER. How can you ever trust her again about anything?"

This article contains remarks made on the Internet by individual people and organizations. MEAWW cannot confirm them independently and does not support claims or opinions being made online.