AITA: Internet schools husband who bans wife from sister’s bachelorette party over her insecurity

Siblings’ bond is one of the most beautiful relationships in the world, but what happens when a man has a sister making unreasonable demands on her brother?

Recently, a man took to Reddit’s AITAH forum to ask the Internet whether he was at fault for banning his wife from coming to his sister’s bachelorette party where he was the only man to attend. 

Seeking input from the Reddit community on whether he was an a*****e, the original poster (OP) shared that he told his wife she couldn’t attend his sister’s bachelorette party, dismissing her desire to join as insecurity.

Reddit author bans his wife from accompanying him to his sister’s bachelorette party

“AITAH for telling my wife she cannot come to my sister’s bachelorette party just because she’s insecure I will be alone with the bridesmaids?,” started the OP in his post. 

The man shared that he has been married to his wife for two years, but they have been together for four. Now, as the OP’s sister is getting married, she has asked him “the man of honor and also walk her down the aisle.”

“Now this wasn’t really a surprise to me when my sister asked me to walk her down the aisle,” shared the author, before explaining the reason for her dependency on him. 

“We suffered a pretty horrible childhood at the hands of our father, who was just a monster,” the OP explained before noting, “We relied on each other and became super close. However, we survived and persevered and we are really happy with where we both are at life right now.”

The man further shared that they are “both in therapy” to heal “some mental scars” from their childhood.

“While it wasn’t a surprise to me that my sister asked me to walk her down the aisle,” the man admitted, “I was surprised when she asked me to be the man of honor, because I wasn’t sure what the MOH duties were as a man.”

“But my sister wanted me to be there every step of the way leading up to the wedding,” defended the OP his sister’s course of action. He added, “So far, I definitely have done a lot of the things an MOH does.”

He later admitted that while he initially “thought it would be sort of awkward” with his sister’s bridesmaids as “I didn’t really know them too much and I’m the only man,” he came over his compunctions later on. 

The OP shared “They’re really friendly and it hasn’t been awkward at all.”

He continued, “There is the bachelorette party planned in a few months, which is a weekend getaway to a resort. Before planning the party, I really thought this would be a “girls” trip, but both my sister and her bridesmaids too really wanted me to come.”

“However, when I told my wife about it, she was surprised, and asked if she could be invited to the bachelorette party too,” noted the author. 

Though the OP asked his sister about the idea, he was turned down, with the sister saying, “She wanted to celebrate the bachelorette party with the people she was closest to in life, and the people she was really comfortable with.” She further highlighted that “she wouldn’t really feel comfortable” if OP’s wife was there. 

The OP added, “But my wife wasn’t really happy with that answer and we ended up having lots of discussions on it,” as his wife was insecure about the trip. 

“My wife finally admitted that she was insecure I would go on a weekend gateway at a resort with the bridesmaids who were “beautiful.” I was shocked with what my wife said and I reassured my wife I love her,” noted the OP. 

“I finally told my wife this was my sister’s wedding and to not make it about her,” the OP claimed to have chided his wife, and noted, “I told my wife she cannot come to party just because she’s insecure.” He ended his post by asking the community, “AITAH?”

Internet shows man fault in his ways

Soon the Redditors took it upon themselves to school the author about the problems in the entire scenario. Several of the social media users even pointed out that it was just "mean" of the siblings to leave out OP's wife from the party. 

One of the users said, "I don’t understand how someone as close to OP as his sister appears to be could omit his wife from the hen party. That’s just being mean. In a similar scenario I was included in everything and I was only the brother’s girlfriend at the time."

Someone else added, "He also refers to him and his sister as “we” through the whole thing but his wife is “my wife”," while another Redditor replied, "This is SO TELLING. OP's wife is the outsider and she's the only one consciously aware of it."

"I think the husband and sister are likely the selfish ones and the wife gets excluded quite a bit because she can’t possibly understand what they went through growing up," noted someone else.

Another user called him out for ignoring his wife, writing, "Wait a minute. It's not a party. It's a whole-a*s girls' "last hurrah" trip, plus you? And you don't think that's at all weird, and are just ignoring your wife's unease instead of being in any way reassuring? Yeah, YTA."

"Naw i wouldn't go never put my wife on the side like that smh she deserves a better husband," declared another angry user.

Someone else noted, "YTA and so is your sister. It’s a bachelorette party, which are mainly for women, and she wants you to be the only man there, but doesn’t want you to bring your wife? That is just asking for trouble and many couples wouldn’t be okay with it. If he brother had a bachelor party in Vegas and wanted her to come with all the guys but didn’t want you coming, would you be okay with it?"

Nevertheless, after getting schooled by the Internet, the OP posted an update, saying that the issue had been resolved. 

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