AITA: Woman feels betrayed after BF hides birth control pills to appease his mom’s desire for children

A healthy relationship between a girlfriend and a boyfriend is built on trust and if broken, things can turn ugly quickly. Many times, a simple lie or hiding things can make a beautiful relationship sour and upset both partners.

Recently, a woman on Reddit's popular "Am I the A*****e" forum shared an incident where she felt betrayed as her boyfriend hid her birth control pills because he and his mom wanted her to have children.

Woman questions boyfriend’s sudden change in intimacy routine

The woman wrote on the AITA forum that she and her boyfriend are 26 years old and have been together for three years. She added that they met in graduate school, where they were in the same class, and after six months of dating, they moved in together.

She also mentioned that he’s a wonderful boyfriend, kind, generous, and always willing to help. She added that they split household responsibilities 50/50.

She said, "We’re both in the same field, but he works from home while I go to the office three days a week. I handle breakfast, and he takes care of dinner on the days I go to work. All in all, things have been great between us."

The woman explained that when they first started dating, they discussed everything from children to marriage. She said that they both agreed that they would wait until they're financially stable before taking that next step.

She wrote, "While we’re comfortable now and no longer living paycheck to paycheck, we still have student loans to pay off. Otherwise, we’re debt-free."

However, she mentioned that things have taken an unexpected turn recently.

She wrote, "Over the past few weeks, my boyfriend has been trying to be intimate without using protection. While I’m on birth control, we had always used protection in the past. A few weeks ago, we were at his parent's house, and his mom made a comment about how beautiful our children would be and how excited she was to be a grandmother."

She explained that she brushed it off as a sweet, casual remark, as his parents have always been kind to her, but they’ve never brought up children before.

Woman finds out boyfriend hid her birth control pills

The woman went on to mention in the post that she noticed her birth control pills were missing from the medicine cabinet. She asked her boyfriend about them, and he claimed he didn’t know where they went.

She added that she thought he may have accidentally thrown them out and bought a new pack. However, when she couldn’t find that one, she confronted him again. This time, he admitted that he had taken them because he wanted to start trying for a baby.

She wrote, "I was shocked. We had not discussed having children, and we hadn’t even talked about getting engaged within last 2 years. I reminded him that we had agreed to wait until we were more financially stable. He explained that he and his mom had talked and believed now was the right time to have a baby, since we’re no longer struggling financially."

She also mentioned, "It hurt to hear that his mom was involved in this decision. I asked him if that was why she had brought up children, and he admitted that he had told his parents and friends we were trying for a baby, but had asked them not to tell me, claiming I wanted to surprise everyone."

The woman wrote that she felt betrayed. She said that instead of discussing it with her, he went behind her back. She told him she needed some time alone, so she went to her parents' house. She hadn’t told them the full story, just that he was on a work trip and she didn’t want to be alone.

She concluded the post, "I'm really confused about what to do next. I love him, but this feels like a huge betrayal. I’m not sure how to move forward. His mom has been calling me, and she spoke to my mom but hasn’t mentioned anything about the situation to her. Any advice would be greatly appreciated."

Internet slams boyfriend for hiding birth control pills

Several internet users sided with the woman who made the Reddit post and slammed his boyfriend for hiding her birth control pills without her knowledge.

A user commented on the Reddit post, "Honey, you’re the surrogate for BF and his mom. They made a decision about your body without your consent. Do you have any idea how insane that is? All your BF had to do was communicate TO YOU that he felt ready to be a father and ask your feelings and thoughts on the subject."

Another person wrote, "HE HID YOUR BIRTH CONTROL PILLS. Because HE feels ready. He tried to take your choice away. This is not a man you want to stay with. This is deception at the highest level. You’re not telling your parents because you know it’s BAD."

Another user added, "This is insane of him; walk away now. Trying to babytrap you because him and HIS MOM decided that you should get pregnant?!?!"

A person also said, "I could never trust anyone that did that to me ever again. That is such a huge violation of your body autonomy. If he can do that, what else is he capable of y'know?"

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