JD Vance poured out his heart as a 'lonely and bored' 20-year-old in emotional blog

MIDDLETOWN, OHIO: Senator JD Vance (R-OH), now the running mate of Donald Trump, once poured his heart and soul into a personal blog titled 'The Ruminations of JD Hamel'.

The blog, verified by the Daily Beast, offers a profound glimpse into the emotional and intellectual journey of Vance before he officially changed his name in 2014. The blog, hosted on Blogger, a popular early-internet platform, is linked to another political blog by Vance called 'The Hillbilly Elite'. 

The genesis of JD Vance's blog

The blog was initiated in 2005, just before JD Vance was deployed to Iraq as a public relations specialist in the Marine Corps. During this period, Vance spent his last days before deployment engrossed in a biography of Winston Churchill and his Bible.

In one of his posts, Vance described his emotional state saying, "Yesterday was incredibly emotional for me. I honestly can say that I felt more like a female than I think I ever have or will. I cried twice, and along with the time my grandma died, those are the only times I've cried since I was 13 years old. So yesterday was weird, and I read a lot yesterday, from a biography on Winston Churchill, one of my heroes, and the Bible."

Vance's blog entries offer a rare and intimate look into his thoughts and emotions during a transformative period in his life. He candidly shared his feelings, which many millennials might find relatable.

For instance, he wrote, "So bored and lonely here that I need something to get my mind back on the right track. I feel really weird right now, like I don't want to hang out with anyone except for my closest friends or my family, and I have few really good friends here and no family."

Emotional reflections and pop culture references in JD Vance's blog

These reflections provide a new perspective on a man who could potentially be a heartbeat away from the vice presidency, revealing themes such as anxiety over the future, social security, and the possibility of homeownership. The blog also highlights Vance's tendency to reinvent himself to suit the moment.

Sean Morrow, a writer at More Perfect Union who shared screenshots of the blog, commented, "In between 'sensitive college boy making casually misogynist comments to explain his emotions' and 'wannabe far-right strongman' Vance made multiple other transformations. It’s a path worth paying attention to."

Vance's blog is not devoid of lighter content. He referenced mid-2000s pop culture, such as Gwen Stefani’s 'Hollaback Girl'. He nostalgically wrote, “Any thought about my family—a memory of Meghan singing 'B-A-N-A-N-A-S' in the back of the car, the card that my little cousins made for me, or whatever—made me tear up.”

His musings also extended to the 2004 film 'Garden State' starring Zach Braff and Natalie Portman.

Vance wrote, “I couldn't watch Garden State because New Jersey’s landscape is so much like Ohio’s, the music is so relevant to my life right now, and the story of a guy returning home, realizing that home isn’t what it used to be, etc. made me want to tear up. The comment he makes about realizing that the place he grew up isn’t really home anymore, and his theory that people settle down because when you lose your home you want to make a new one really resonates with me right now, and I’m sure it does with some of you too.”

JD Vance details his life in Iraq

In September 2005, Vance updated his blog to reflect on his new environment in Iraq. After traveling through Ireland, Hungary, and Kuwait, he finally arrived at a former Iraqi Air Force base.

He described the experience vividly, “The temperature in Kuwait hit me like a ton of bricks, it was 125 when we got off the plane.” He noted the stark new reality he faced, mentioning, “Today I saw a concrete bunker with a crashed MiG in it, and I have to admit it was pretty cool.”

To entertain himself, Vance sought out "Hajji DVDs," pirated movies sold cheaply. He wrote, “Basically, these Iraqi dudes pirate movies and sell them here the same day they come out in theaters in the US, at a cost of $2.50 apiece.”

Despite the challenges, he expressed a sense of purpose, “I’m a little homesick, but mostly happy to be here and finally contribute, even if only a small part, to our country’s mission.”

Vance’s blog reveals a thoughtful, eager young Marine dedicated to serving his country. However, his views have evolved significantly. He later condemned the Iraq war during his speech at the Republican National Convention, where he accepted the nomination for vice president.

Despite the personal insights and updates shared on his blog, Vance ceased writing just five months after his first post.